🎮 When Words Hurt: The Dark Side of Online Gaming

🎮 When Words Hurt: The Dark Side of Online Gaming

I never thought one word — a single, venomous word — could make me want to walk away from a game I loved.

It was the May 24 weekend. My husband and I, both gamers, had been out late Friday night. We were in recovery mode the rest of the weekend — a little sluggish, a little tired. During our downtime, I jumped into Hogwarts Legacy, trying to finish a boss duel, while my husband dozed off after logging into Atlas, a game we’ve both spent countless hours in. That evening, our island in Atlas entered its combat phase — a scheduled window when other companies can attack your territory.

When I noticed our structures being destroyed, panic hit like a wave.

I quickly switched over, bed-traveled to the mortars, and tried my best to hold the line. I was alone, unarmored (what we call "naked" in-game), and firing at enemy ships that had just enough skill to stay out of range. The team attacking us had a reputation for “off-lining” — striking when defenders are asleep or away, never during an actual fight. They were proud of it, too.

Frustrated and desperate, I typed a message into global chat:
"Off-lining again I see."

And then it came.
“Retard.”
The word I hate most. Misused, degrading, and thrown like a dagger without thought. It stopped me cold.

I shouted in real life, waking my husband. He told me not to respond, to let it go. But how could I? I was livid. I called them out for using the word, especially without even understanding its meaning. I wanted to post the definition. I wanted them to see the impact. I reported the incident to the server owner, telling him plainly:
“I will not stand for this.”

I was ready to quit — uninstall the game I’d loved for so long. The same game that brought my husband and me closer. The one that connected us to beautiful souls from all over the world — some lost, some found — and the game that inspired my writing journey.

It hurt. Deeply.
Because words matter.
And in the digital world, they often cut without consequence.

You never know who’s behind the screen. A teenager? An adult? Someone dealing with pain of their own? It doesn’t matter. Hate is hate. And it's one of the biggest reasons people leave gaming communities — not just because of the game mechanics, because let's face it sometimes game mechanics can cause issues as well. It is also because of the people who refuse to be decent human beings.

Gaming can be such a powerful tool for connection, creativity, and fun. But this experience was a painful reminder of how fragile those connections can be when the worst of humanity seeps through a keyboard.

To those reading this: You don’t have to tolerate toxicity.
Speak up. Support each other. And remember — no game is worth sacrificing your dignity or your peace of mind.

I’m still here. I’m still gaming. But I’m also still healing from that moment — one I won’t soon forget.

Until next time Lovelies

Always, Ambrose Fider